Showing posts with label Agent 98. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Agent 98. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 23, 2024

All Together Now

Is “in one’s altogether” a regional expression? Have you heard the term used in conversation? Do you know what it means? I found out the hard way, and I remember the day.

Whenever I tell a story about Kwajalein I feel I need to preface it with “it was an unusual time in our lives, and we were in an unusual place” but that never quite explains it all. Indeed, a time and a place like no other.

One of Tom’s closest friends was Rich, a colleague at Lincoln Lab and maybe a few years older than Tom, but not by much. Rich was married to Joan, and they were lovely people and Tom and Rich loved to talk food and finance on their flights (or boat rides, if the airplane windshield doesn't cooperate) to work, because it was Kwaj and it was unlike anyplace else. In my earliest days, as I met all those new people I would write descriptions in the margins of the phone book (because it was 1998 and I had 2000 names to learn) and the decription next to the Sasielas was “elegant, tall people on the flight from Majuro” because they were objectively very tall; but the first thing you'd notice about them was that they were even kinder than they were tall. I was stressed, Tom and I were probably bickering (we called ourselves The Bickersons for a reason), and these two sets of hands reached down from on high and grabbed our babies and said, Now, breeeeeathe. It might have been five minutes and it could have been five hours, but what I remember is how kind they were to on the last flight of my first trip to Kwajalein with two kids under two, and I immediately loved them both.  The fall after we arrived Rich and Joan’s daughter, son-in-law, and grandchildren moved there for work, too, and Amy became and remains one of my dearest friends.

It was a very small community on a very small military base, and we all lived within easy walking distance of each other’s homes, in a very safe environment where we rarely locked our doors. Amy and her family had left for several weeks (most of us came back to Boston at least once a year for work and that’s likely why they were gone) but their kitchen door was open as I knew it would be. Probably their front door was, too, but we were kitchen door friends, and often let ourselves in.

In what will come as surprise to some, I don’t actually make a habit of entering the homes of my friends when they are not there, but I had good reason to do it this time, I’m sure, even if I don’t exactly remember why I did. I probably was dropping off a dish, or maybe I was leaving a meal,  anticipating their return because that last flight, the third of three five hour flights from Boston, was a killer.

So imagine my surprise when I opened the back door to Amy’s house only to be  greeted by Rich, my friend’s father, and my husband’s best friend, cooking bacon at his daughter’s stove and not even wearing an apron! To cook bacon? Who cooks bacon without an apron?

I lifted my jaw up off Amy’s kitchen floor, backed slowly out the door, and in those days before email and cell phones, immediately called Joan, asking for her to apologize to Rich for me because in my … stupor? … I had not done so, and I explained what happened. 

Joan laughed, explaining, “Oh, that’s just Rich cooking in his altogether." Which doesn’t quite mean without and apron. If only it had.

While I have your attention, this is what climate change is doing to the Marshall Islands.

I can see my house from here 

We called the house Four Palms (bonus Geof adds scale)

We never lacked for fresh potassium straight from the backyard

The main route home after work, they called this spot the Callahan Tunnel


Tuesday, April 7, 2020

Breathing in the Time of Coronavirus



I know I haven't been blogging much lately, but I love this pattern for no-sew face masks and thought I'd share. You need to scroll to the end to find the no-sew version, and if you don't like this link from the CDC, just google and you'll find a ton to choose from. The only change I made was that I found the multiple layers formed by folding towards the center several times was a little hard to breathe through, so I accordion-folded pleats, and tacked them in place. When you wash the accordion folded one you can pull it out of the drier a few minutes early and pull it taut, and you'll get your pleats back. It's important to wear with the pleat openings facing down so that detritus doesn't collect in there. Also please remember wear a mask IN ADDITION TO, not as a replacement for, social distancing.

Let's be careful out there. I love you all.

If you live in the greater DC area, can I encourage you, once restaurants have reopened for business, to patronize Medium Rare (locations in Arlington, Bethesda, and Cleveland Park.) Since they didn't have the eat-in traffic to sustain the business they decided to open the kitchen up to prepare free meals for seniors 70+, as well as offering takeout and delivery for everyone. They have an awesome Sunday Brunch too, sparkly stuff included. They put out a call on Twitter for volunteers to deliver meals, and since I stopped working at Wegman's in early March I had an excess of free time on my hands, and an itch to help however I could. If you know me you probably know that food is my love language and I was thrilled when they contacted me to help out. Here's a little thing that happened during my first evening delivering meals. Why, oh why, didn't I wash my hair that day?

We're all in this together.



So now for storytime. I feel like I haven't told a story in a while.

98 is an adult now so let's be clear this story happened a long time ago. But when he was a kid he used to love to eat lemons, and by "eat lemons" I mean pulp, rind, and all. I think he liked freaking people out but he still really does like super sour, super tangy food. He’d grab the lemon slices from our drinks so often that we didn’t even notice most times.

He and I were home alone one day while we were visiting Auntie Jeanne in Texas (this was probably preschool days) and he sneezed.  I calmly looked on the floor and discerned  a grey, mottled thing, about 1/2" square. It was probably much smaller than that but that's honestly what my brain remembers.) A grey, mottled thing that had shot out of his nose. Then I calmly looked at him (as mommas do), sitting in his high chair. And then I COMPLETELY FREAKED OUT. I wrung my hands. I paced. I consulted the medical books. I consulted him, the 3-year-old (as freaked out mommas do). Then I wrapped it in a Kleenex (for when the ER doc asked me exactly what piece of brain I thought my son had sneezed out, I guess?) In my defense this this was definitely grey, and they don’t call it “grey matter” for no reason and I was sure this was some piece of brain despite the fact that he was acting just fine. Jeanne and the boys eventually came home and she also didn't have the slightest idea what body part this was. So we both wrung our hands together.  Then my nephew, I89 for the purposes of this story, who, if 98 was 3, he must have been 11) looked at it. And looked at me. And looked back at this piece of brain matter that his cousin had sneezed out his nose, and said, in that way that preteens, who are always right even when you're sure they're not ... "Auntie Linda, it kind of looks like a ... lemon."

It was only days later that I realized he must have snatched a lemon slice, and choked on it, before it settled in his nasal passages, to be sneezed out at the most freakworthy moment. The experience didn't teach him not to steal lemons, and it certainly didn't teach me to pay better attention. But somehow he's made it to 22.

Kids. Right? People wonder why I have pink hair.


Saturday, April 29, 2017

Road Test

Blue is me. Grey is 98's Auntie Jeanne.

You're welcome.

Oh, and another thing I forgot about until this very second. So, the tester gets out of the car and I hop in the front and we drive off, into the empty-ish parking lot at the Watertown Mall . And I turn to 98 who's still driving and say, "I'm sorry. But it's not too bad. When we get home, get back online and make a new appointment and you can retest soon and we'll just practice like crazy in the meantime." And he replied, "What are you talking about, Mom. I passed." And I was, "Um, no you didn't." I mean, I was there. I just saw this whole thing with my own eyes. I saw the guy stamp on the permit. I didn't know what it said but I figured it was "retest required." So I made him stop the car and pull over and show me his permit. And sure enough, it was stamped, "passed." I was flabbergasted. I spent the rest of the ride trying not to clutch the door handle too obviously.

Saturday, September 24, 2016

Iceland, Part One

Iceland: Beautiful. Friendly. Rainy.
This sign greets visitors arriving at Keflavik International Airport,
about an hour outside Reykjavik. Words both wise and welcoming. 

Comprised of literally thousands of delicate layers, this formation reminded me of a fragile, sweet mille feuille.
From a little farther out, you see the basalt columns that formed naturally as the lava floes  spread and cooled and cracked  into their crystals.

 The photos above give a clearer view of the formation for sure, but I had to include this next view from a distance, for sheer scale. That tiny red dot at the cave entrance (center) is a person ...

Black Sands Beach was about a 2.5 hour drive from Reykjavik, outside Vik, on Iceland's south shore. I had decided early on that I'd stop at any information point/travellers' center/lookout that struck my fancy so the 2.5 hour drive ended up taking nearly 7, and I barely got there before sunset. I was particularly glad I was alone that day. If 96 and 98 had been with me, they surely would have smothered me in my sleep that night.






I drove past this memorial on one of the main highways several times before I finally stopped one day, expecting to maybe say a little prayer and be on my way. Sometimes I say a little prayer for people figuring even if I don't know their names, someone does. I was particularly touched by one of the markers: If you look closely you can see that one of the crosses has another, smaller, cross attached. I figured it was for a mother and child. I asked an Icelander learned the story. Roughly translated, 'These crosses are in memory of those who have died on [the road named] Sudurlandsvegur, between Reykjavik and Selfoss.' The memorial was erected in 2006 both as a way to remember the loss of life on the curvy road and to highlight for all the importance of maintaining the country's transportation infrastructure. I was very glad I stopped there and found this sweet, simple memorial.





Monday, November 25, 2013

Just a Suggestion ...

... but here's a thought for all the teenage boys that follow me (Yes, there are a couple of you.):

When you're going to stay over at a friend's house and mom's asleep so you text your bro and ask him to let her know, tell him to leave the note on your bedroom door. When you leave the note where she has her tea and reads the paper and does her sudoku, she might not see it right away.

Because here's the thing: when you don't come home unexpectedly and your mom checks on you in the morning before she walks the dog and expects you to be there and you're not, she's going to do things like:

  • Call your friends
  • Call her sister even though it's only 4 a.m.  in San Antonio
  • Walk around the house wringing her hands
  • Call your friends' moms
  • Think about calling the police
  • Imagine the worst and maybe look up the phone numbers of all the local emergency rooms
  • Clean the house so it's not too bad when CPS comes to take her surviving child
  • Oh, and walk the dog so that she's not cleaning up dog poop on the living room floor while she's trying to arrange a search party

The one thing she is NOT going to do is drink her tea and read the paper.

We cool?

Saturday, August 31, 2013

A Propos of Nothing in Particular

Agent 96
A propos of nothing in particular, I thought this was as good a time as any to share my theory of parenting:



Agent 98
God makes babies cute so we won't toss them out the car window as we're driving down the highway.

He makes teenagers big enough that we can't.
Not actually my teens. But I have as much chance of getting a picture
of them these days as I have of tossing these specimens out a window.

Sunday, August 11, 2013

Harvest Time

It started innocently enough. "Let's do cukes," I said."I bet we could grow cucumbers in the garden." 


98 with today's harvest
 
If you can't read the scale, that's twenty-six pounds of cucumbers.
(Click photo to enlarge.)

  
I named him "Cukezilla."

I'm a little afraid of him.

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Holiday Newsletter, 2012



96 and 98 at Yellowstone
Greetings from our home to yours!

Oooh, boy, I'm late this year. Given the cookies that need baking, the ingredients that need assembing into our traditional Christmas lasagna dinner, the presents that need wrapping, and a house I might more easily bulldoze than clean before company for the holiday, I'm pretty sure this will be a January newsletter and not a December one. Alas.

This is not the part where I was going 85 ...
this is the part where I was going 3
Continuing my policy of "travel domestically and ignore the complaining", our summer vacation this year took us first to Yellowstone, then on to scenic Billings, Montana, where we met up with my sister for the Mt. Rushmore leg of our journey. Continuing another theme, the "teenagers, let me tell you a story about teenagers" theme, the highlight of Yellowstone for the boys was the day each, separately, got to stay alone in the hotel room, without having to see the lake, or the Continental Divide, or Old Faithful, or Mammoth Hot Springs, or a single bison or any of the myriad wonders boring nature stuff to be beheld within the country's first national park. Yes, that would be the hotel without a landline, or cell service, or wifi, or tv, or fm radio, or air conditioning. Honestly, it's hard not to take this stuff personally, but then I remember that my favorite part of the vacation was the 48 hours of no bickering and no poking while I toured alone with one while the other stayed at that hotel without a landline, cell service, or wifi ... although the long, straight, empty stretches of Rte. 90 with its 85 mph speed limit (aka, "a few miles below optimum speed" friendly advisory) came in a very close second. 
Nick Clifford, author and carver;
98; 96

At Mt. Rushmore we met Nick Clifford, one of the monument's original carvers. He worked on it from 1938-40. Yes, we bought the book. Autographed!

Agent 96, at 16, is midway through his high school junior year and has started looking at colleges. On the short list at the moment are Columbia, Brown, and Cornell. It looks like we may take a trip to Chicago this summer to see Northwestern, too. He's investigating journalism (heh, heh) as a major, but ask him this question again next week.

98, Graduation Night


Agent 98, almost 15, ended 8th grade with a bang this past June, getting his braces off the day before graduation; achieving a science award for straight "A"s in the subject; and earning the Amelia Chebator Award, which came with a small scholarship. He earned the award, in the words of the presenter, for being "always ready with a friendly smile, a kind word, or a caring deed." His favorite class this, his freshman year, is world history. He's decided to drop bowling for a while and this year has taken a spot on the debate team at school.

The animals continue to entertain, comfort and irritate ... occasionally somehow simultaneously. Zoet's unbridled enthusiasm keeps her ever-charming; Scruffy's growing purr, once barely audible is now almost a small bellow, I hope signalling his contentment; Momo's decided she's now an indoor cat and spends most of every day in a sunroom window, looking out. But not in a longing to experience it way ... more like an "I can't believe those silly cats forget there's a bed and food in here. Oh, snap, more for me" kind of way; and little Pixel divides his loyalties evenly among us all, leading each of the humans to believe he or she is his favorite. Clearly only Pix and I know the truth.
Gene Display inscription
DFCI, Boston, MA



We wish you the very best this holiday season
 and throughout the New Year!


Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Going Places and Doing Stuff

As I mentioned previously,when we were in Denver last summer en route to the Grand Canyon we took a voluntary bump in exchange for $400 in United travel vouchers, each. So that was $400 for my sister, who used them to fly up to Boston last fall, and $400 each for 98, 96 and me.  I felt like I had won the lottery. If I recall correctly, we arrived at our destination within about an hour of our original arrival time, so, except for when I cried in the middle of the airport, it was a win all around.

So what do I do with the $1200 in vouchers I received? The vouchers that say right on them, "Cannot be replaced if lost or stolen". Yeah, those vouchers. I had big plans for those vouchers. Big plans indeed. Said plans involved girlfriends, and the Windy City, and, most importantly, no damn kids. So what do I do with them? I leave them at my sister's house. Stupid vouchers not growing legs and opposable thumbs in order to get themselves into my luggage like I expected them to.

Given their transferable status (anyone could bring them to United and book flights; the names on the vouchers did not have to match the names on the new tickets) my sister wisely carried them with her when she came up to Boston (using her vouchers)  a couple of months later. But somehow, despite seeing each other daily for her whole trip neither one of us thought to grab those vouchers. Those same stupid vouchers never once thought to holler out, "Hey girlfriend, don't forget us! We're in here waiting for you!" How rude.

So Jeanne left them at my mom's house, and I guess as a lesson to me now the vouchers decide to grow those legs and thumbs and hide in a folder with some other paperwork. No match for my Mom, though, the vouchers finally surface, literally 24 hours before I decide to buy the tickets and give up on ever finding them. Now I feel like I've won the lottery all over again.

Only now it's not "Chicago with girlfriends" anymore. It's omg-not-again vacation with the  kids again.

Hotels booked. Car reserved. Triptik ordered. Now we just have to listen to that incessant tick-tock tick-tock of the clock ticking down until ... "omg-not-again vacation with the kids" time.

And  for some peripherally related content ...

So while 96 and I are having a our annual "Where do you want to go on vacationWhy do we always have to go places and do stuff?" conversation, I am saddened to learn that I have unwittingly doomed my grandchildren to boring, lonely George Jetson summer vacations filled with boring flying cars, mind-controlled 3-d antigravity video game consoles, and invisibility cloaks while their friends travel to Norway or an asteroid or at least Fresno for summer vacation because their parents weren't forced, forced I tell 'ya, to travel all day, every day, day-after-day, all summer long ten days a year. I have roooooined travel for 96 and 98. Don't mess with me:  I'm mean that way.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Where'd They Go?

Where'd they go? You know, those cute little ghosties and goblins, scarfers of candy, trick-or-treaters who would gladly let me have the Reese's while they take the Sour Patch Kids.


And who left behind those smelly, smarmy Bigfoots?
1996: 96's first Halloween. 10 days old.

1997: 96 at one year (and ten days). He's a black cat, in case it isn't obvious (don't worry, it's not).




1998: Firefighter and his trusty sidekick, Dalmation.



1999: Ah, the Thomas days.  96 totally wore that Thomas the Tank Engine costume around the house for a week before Halloween, practicing for the big costume contest. On the day of the contest, he refused to parade before the judges. We woulda won, I'm certain!  98, still under 2, wasn't talking yet, but the passengers on his Bertie the Bus were all the animals whose sounds he liked to make.




Every parent's nightmare:
"Mom, I want to be a front end loader for Halloween."
2000: Buzz Lightyear. That's a pretzel bin
from BJ's I made the helmet out of. On Kwaj,
desperate times call for desperate measures.

























2001: 98 wanted to be a skinny spider in 2001. And that's Rolie Polie Olie on the right.
(...he's small and smart and round, and in the land of curves and curls he's the swellest kid around ...)


2003: 96 won first prize at school's second grade Crazy Hat Day contest.
At $4 a pack for those Yugio cards, this hat probably cost $75.

2007:  96 was Link from Nintendo (not to worry, I didn't know wth that was, either)
and 98 was a Minuteman.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

A Day In Western Massachusetts

96 at Glendale Falls, Middlefield, MA
I spend so much time on here bellyaching about my kids. Stupid teenagers. How they have to complain about everything. Thank goodness they're there to correct me all the time because, well, I'm stupid.


Not all the time, I guess.

98 and Zoet at the Falls
I gotta tell you, my kids were great today. Today we did a little day trip to the western part of the state, to see some waterfalls and hike a bit. Did you know there are fossilized dinosaur footprints in Massachusetts? Neither did I!

Don't get me wrong -- they didn't want to go, and made sure I knew it. The lure of an early allowance (even with the caveat that early allowance meant no complaining today) bought me a day of peace and quiet (Unlike their mother, I guess these kids can be bought. For cheap.) So we drive the two-plus hours to the first stop, to the utterly foreign sound of ...

What is that sound, anyway? No. It can't be. But it is. Is it? I think it's siblings. Siblings getting along.  With each other. Dare I detect even some enthusiasm?

We had a lovely picnic lunch at Glendale Falls, and took a bit longer rock climbing than I expected, so we decided to forgo Chesterfield Gorge so that we wouldn't miss the footprints.  But there it was, right off the road we were on, so we stopped at the gorge, which might actually be the prettiest spot in Massachusetts, and then headed to our final destination: the footprints in Holyoke.


Chesterfield Gorge, Chesterfield, MA
And to think we almost skipped this place! This was my favorite stop of the day.


The Falls

Dinosaur footrprints. You can see the three toes in the upper left.


A closer look


All those fossil footprints are provided courtesy of all these layers
Did I mention the best part? All of these sites are maintained by The Trustees of Reservations, and all were free. Free to park, free to enter; donations appreciated.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Ah, Mother's Day. Good Times, Good Times

To fully appreciate the story, you have to understand that on Kwaj, a lot of the menfolk went to work every day on another island, Roi-Namur.   It was about a 40 mile commute: a quick plane ride most days.   That is, if the windshield doesn't fall out on landing, like it did Tom's very first day of work in August of '98.  There followed  a scramble of plane inspections and months of boatrides and abbreviated workdays because of the 3-hour commute each way.   But usually, the guys (it was mostly husbands at least in my circle of friends) all got back on-island at the same time, all hopped on their bikes at the airport and walked in their respective front doors within minutes of landing.   It was pretty predictable.

So it was the day before Mother's Day in '99 (the workweek was Tuesday through Saturday, to maximize overlapping office hours with CONUS [Continental US]). I heard the plane come in, and got supper on the table, expecting Tom any minute. Minutes ticked away, no Tom. More time passed, and still no husband walking through the door.   "Oh, yeah. Tomorrow's Mother's Day. He's probably stopped off to buy me something. What a great guy," I thought to myself (because my thought bubbles are always grammatically structured sentences.)  This, even though I had known this man some number of years already, and really should have known better.  Eventually he walked through the door, with no gift hiding under his arm, and I surmised he dropped it at a friend's house on the way home. Cute.

He played it totally cool, even though I knew something was up, and I knew he knew I knew something was up. Cool as a cucumber.

So Saturday night morphs into Sunday morning, and here I am, surrounded by my little family on my first Mother's Day on Kwaj. Breakfast comes, breakfast goes.   Nothing.   We pass the morning, and I begin to wonder just when my dear, sweet husband is going to retrieve the gift from the friend's house to give me.   Lunch.   Nothing.   I start getting a little concerned, and I guess I can admit now that my half of our conversation might have gotten a bit, well, let's call it "curt" by mid-afternoon.

Eventually my -- okay -- total bitchiness gets the better of him, and he snaps at me. "What the hell bug flew up your ass today?" he inquires.   (Can't you just hear him?)  "You ... forgot ... sniff, sniff, ... Motherrrr's Daaaaaaay!" I wept, running up the stairs.

I never did find out why Tom was those few minutes late that day.   Maybe he had a flat, or his chain slipped, or he was talking with a friend before leaving for home; I don't know.    I know he felt just awful, and he went to 1010 (the store) and got me a very nice card and a bottle of expensive wine.    I drank the wine, and I probably didn't share with him.

Then he got onto the internet, making his first online purchase that night.   And that, children, is how Momma got those pretty diamond and sapphire earrings.

 ________________________________________________________________________

My membership dues:
Agent 96 in November 1996 - 1 month old

Agent 98 in March 1998 - 1 month old

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Small Victories

I don't recall the last time Tom changed the propane tank on the gas grill, but I do specifically recall coercing a visitor to change it for me once, probably in the fall of 2009. We are big time grillers, and Tom used to grill at least once or twice a week, year round. But I used this last propane tank judiciously, often lighting only the first of the three burners, which was usually enough heat for my purposes.  That tank of propane lasted me until just after Christmas 2010. I know this because I was at a New Year's Day open house held by some dear friends and asked the Mister for a quick propane tank changing tutorial while he was grillmastering his wicked awesome steak tips. He made it seem simple enough.

My grill spent the season under that hump on the right
But I am embarrassed to tell you how terrified I am of propane tanks. Those suckers can explode, you know, and they probably do on a daily basis even though I've never actually heard of it happening (propane tank industry lobbyists probably paid to squelch any negative press), nor do I know anyone who knows anyone who it happened to.  When Tom and I would refill the tanks at BJ's he'd have me in the front passenger seat with the tank (sometimes two of them) at my feet.  I would be wearing my worst backseat driver hat, heart in my throat, begging Tom, "Hey, watch out for that pothole;" or instructing, "Do you see that car? There? That car there?" (said vehicle likely being a half-mile away, down a side street, going in the opposite direction), and the ever-helpful, "For the love of God, slow down!"

Between my fear of driving with the propane tank in the car, the sixteen feet of snow that covered the grill for much of the last three months, and my absolute certainty of the explosion that would ensue once I connected the tank and lit the grill, well, I just never got around to changing the tank.

I had a bit of a quandary, though: I can't quite ask the neighbor, "Hey, Mister, would you please come to my house and connect my propane tank and ignite it for me, so that I am not the one harmed during the inevitable explosion.  Whenever it's convenient, thanks."  I mean, he has a wife and kids, and they live just a few houses away.  They'd probably hear the explosion and blame me.

With 96 off at a school event this Saturday afternoon,  98 was home with me doing a chores. I called him down, and quite nonchalantly explained that when you install a new propane tank and light it the first time, it's usually a good idea to have someone else around.  You know, like when someone spots you in gym class.  I didn't say anything about explosions or fireballs, and I was very calm, indeed. But 98 says, "Hmmm, that sounds pretty dangerous. You're not going to make it explode are you?" My lips said, "Of course not."  (Did I just see a flicker of disappointment on 98's face?)


My eyebrow furrow might have sent a different message:  Oh, 98, you have no idea how scared of an explosion I am.  I still don't have all my paperwork taken care of, so I really don't want to die in a fireball today. But man, I  really want that steak I've been marinating since yesterday.

No. Instead I continued, "It's just a good habit to get into.  So come outside with me, okay?"  No suggestion to take the phone with him and pre-dial 911.  No precautionary unwinding of the garden hose. Not even so much as a reminder that the fire extinguisher is inside the cellar door. We just we head outside with a wrench to free up the old tank and tighten the new one, and a package of fireplace matches so that once I have opened the burner valve I can drop in the wooden match and at least step back.


Old tank, check. New tank, check. Valve, burner, match. Check, check, check.  Then the best sound I'd heard in three months, the tiniest little whoosh as the flame kicked on.  Fingers, lips, eyebrows: check, check, check.


A few minutes to preheat and that other sound that was music to these ears: the sizzle of the steak hitting the grill.

Oh, medium rare ribeye steaks from the butcher shop at Hilltop Steak House, come to mama!

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Happy Birthday, 98

98's birthday was last month, and I gave him tickets to Blue Man Group.   We didn't go until tonight, a month later, because this was the first 5:00 pm show I could get five front row seats for, and I knew I couldn't be trusted to stay awake for the 8:00 pm show.   It was: me, 96, 98, and two of 98's friends, let's call them Curt and Rod. They weren't twins, but if I had twins I would totally have named them Curt 'n Rod.  I am happy to report that I survived the evening without running away screaming, leaving them to take the train home alone spent the evening with four teenage boys. I love all four of these boys, and would run in to a burning building to save any of them but man, oh man, are teenage boys insufferable.

They argued about Pokemons (the plural of which 96 has reminded me more than once is Pokemon, but I say Pokemons because, well, I know it bugs him) and they argued about how long ago 15 minutes was.  They disagreed about 'Droid or iPhone.  They debated the merits of public vs. private vs. parochial.   They each knew stuff that the others didn't know, and they each had to make sure that all the others knew they knew this stuff they didn't know.   Do you remember Charlie Brown's teacher?   By the end of the car ride, that's all I heard.   That, punctuated with the random, "No, you're wrong," and "Shut up," and "You don't know anything."    Good to know it's not just mine.

The other thing I noticed about teenage boys: They havetohavetohaveto have the last word.   Every. Single.  Time.   The last word.  Spoken.  Has to be theirs.   And not someone else's.

See how annoying that is?

All's well that ends well, though. 98 made it home with a piece of spit-paintball-artwork from one of the bits.  As we were leaving I handed him a sharpie to ask one of the Blue Men for an autograph on the way out. The Blue Man did him one better, and swiped a bit of blue ink/makeup/whatever it is off his face and planted a cool thumbprint in the corner.  And the next time we go, we're going to count how many marshmallows that one guy ultimately crammed into his mouth.  Double digits, for sure.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentine's Day, 1996

It seems to me I'm always mentioning how I find treasures rifling through drawers and files while I'm looking for something else. Today's tale is no different, except I don't recall that I was particularly looking for anything.  I just recently stumbled across the little card I used to tell Tom I was pregnant with Agent 96 on Valentine's Day, 1996. And even with the evidence in my hand, including the positive pregnancy test, which today still shows the [+] (and no, I'm not going to show you a picture of it!), I honestly have no recollection of doing this. I recall the card; in fact, when I was putting together photos for his memorial I wanted to include the card, a small, die-cut tiger.  A little secret between us was that I called him "Tiger", and he called me "Kitten". Eww, I know. What worse, when 96 was born, we called him "Tigger" sometimes. (Remember that rattle Zoet chewed up? It was 96's Tigger.)

Quick, get the insulin.

I remember giving him the card for Valentine's Day in 1996, I just don't recall the whole "I'm having a baby" spin.  How does a person forget something like that?

Usually, events with the second child take a back seat to the first: 96's baby book is complete, including the first day he sat, unaided, in a grocery cart (5 months) and his first fat lip (during the April Fool's Day blizzard in 1997); I sold 98's baby book in a yard sale, factory seal unbroken. The photos in 96's first year album are labeled; I don't even have a first-year album for 98. Of course, I famously have both boys' umbilical stumps in a carton in the attic. They are in the jeweler's boxes my engagement ring and wedding band came in.  Suffice it to say, saving those little belly buttons had me off raisins for a while.

Back to Agent 98. It's hard to imagine a memory burned more strongly into my synapses:. There I was, 40 years old, in the upstairs bathroom: 6-month-old 96 (who was still nursing full time, for the record) in one arm, and there, in my other hand, another [+].

"Tom ... can you come up here for a sec?"

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Interstate Adventures

I found myself in Cranston, RI this morning, where Agent 98 had a bowling tournament at Lang's Lanes. (Don't miss the chili cheese fries!) It was our second time bowling in Cranston in as many weeks. He didn't have the best day, but with a high score of 103, he beat his average, and that's really the point anyway.

So I get on the highway to come home after we're done, and notice a couple of interesting buildings that I hadn't noticed on the ride down ... and then another one ... and then I think to myself, "Where'd Providence go?"   I had driven eight miles on 95 South before I realized my mistake.

If that was only the first time I'd ever gotten lost on 95 that would be one thing. Or if it had been the most lost, I could accept that. But I have an even stupider lost than that. One that makes me cringe every time I think of it. Thankfully, I was alone in the car when it happened.

I had just moved to Medford, and had previously had few, if any, reasons to take Rte. 2 west to 95.  I was headed to Waltham (this was in our Costco days) which meant 2W to 95S. After a couple of minutes on 95 I noticed that the Burlington Mall was on the wrong side of the road (and later learned it wasn't even along my expected route). I absolutely believe that any normal, functioning human being, on seeing the Burlington Mall on the left hand side of the road but expecting it to be on the right, would think "Oh, I'm going the wrong way." Totally normal reaction.  But me? I thought to myself, "Hey, when did they move the Burlington Mall?"

So you try waking up with this brain every morning.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

It Was Bittersweet

It was bittersweet.

Today Agent 98 had a bowling tournament in Lowell and the Garmin sent me up on 95 to 495 which is my preferred route to points north.  But it brought me home via Rte 3, a route I always detested because before it was rebuilt many years ago it was narrow, curvy, slow, and crowded -- and all speedtrappy whenever it wasn't slow and crowded. I have never have gotten into the habit of using it, and almost didn't today, but it was a Sunday afternoon, so I went along with the instructions.


It was bitter, because for the first time since May 10, 1994, when we crossed 110, I didn't hear how Mr. An Wang had bought the land and built the Wang Labs building (which is shaped like a "W" you know) for something like $60m in the 70's and sold it for something like $100k in the 90's. It was sweet because, well, for the first time since May 10, 1994, I didn't hear how Mr. Wang had bought the land and built the building for something like $60m in the 70's and sold it for something like $100k in the 90's. I mean, really, Tom? You've told me that story before. Like. Every. Single. Time.

So what did I do? When we crossed 110 I pointed out the building and told 98 the story of how Mr. An Wang had bought the land and built the building (which is shaped like a "W" you know) for something like $60m in the 70's and sold it for something like $100k in the 90's.

It wasn't quite the same, but family traditions have to start somewhere, right?

Friday, December 3, 2010

Buried Deep in the Back of my Already Overpacked Linen Closet ...

About a week before Tom started his first drug clinical trial (mid-2009) we spent an afternoon and a fair pile of cash in our local Vitamin Shoppe, GNC and CVS on vitamins, supplements and whatnot. Of course, one of the caveats of clinical trialdom is "no non-prescribed drugs or supplements". So while he had consumed a few pills from some of the bottles, some of the bottles are still factory sealed.

Here's what I have. If I note that the bottle is open, then only a few days' worth are gone.
  • American Health Chewable Super Papaya Enzyme Plus 360 tablets - open - exp 6/11
  • MushroomScience Certified Organic Coriolus Super Strength 90 tablets 600 mg  - exp 1/12 (I have five of these factory sealed and one open)
  • Osteo Bi-Flex 120 tablets - open - exp 2/11
  • Vitamin Shoppe Selenium 300 tablets 200 mcg - open - exp 10/10
  • CVS Glucosamine Chondroitin Double Strength 120 caplets - exp 9/10 (I have one of these opened and one factory sealed)
  • Nature's Way Reservatol Synergistic Formula 60  Vcaps 37.5 mcg - open - exp 2/10
  • GNC L-Glutamine Powder 8 oz -  factory sealed - exp 5/11
  • Vitamin Shoppe Borage Oil  300 softgel capsules 1000 mg -open -  exp 10/09
  • Vitamin Shoppe Soy Isoflavones 120 tablets  - open - exp 1/11
  • Vitamin Shoppe Turmeric Extract 95% curcumin  300 capsules - open - exp 11/11
  • Vitamin Shoppe Green Tea Extract 75% Polyphenols 300 Capsules 250 mg - open - exp 8/10
  • CVS Natural Fish Oil 198  Softgels 1200 mg - factory sealed - exp 7/11
  • CVS Spectravite multivitamin 250 tablets - factory sealed - exp 1/10

If you are interested in any or all of these dietary supplements, drop me a comment or send me an email and we'll work something out. I don't want to sell them; I want to give them to you. I'll even pay postage. I just don't want these to go to waste.

You will see that some have passed their expiration date. Keep in mind that I have codeine in my medicine cabinet that was prescribed in 1998 after my son was born (in case you didn't notice, their blog nicknames are their birth years - Agents 96 and 98) by a doctor in Medford. Then we moved to Kwaj for nearly 5 years, and we've been back in Medford for 8 more years. And I took one a couple of weeks ago when I had that sinus headache. So no, we're not so much into expiration dates around here. I won't side-eye you if you respect them.  Just don't lecture me that I don't.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Welcome to My World

"Mom, do you think the cider will be warm enough if I zap it for 15 seconds?"

"No, 98, I'd zap it for a minute."

"Do you think 30 seconds would work?"

"No, I think a minute would be enough."

"Okay, I'll try 30 seconds."

True Story

Monday, November 15, 2010

You May Want to Come Back Later if You're Having Lunch Now

I've had some pretty disgusting moments in my history of marriage and parenting. I was with my husband for sixteen years, and I have two boys, now teenagers, and we've had more than ten pets, if you count all the cats, frogs, turtles, snakes and the dog. And during this time, I have had some pretty disgusting moments. I'm not sure I've ever told my most disgusting moment story from beginning to end.

My most disgusting moment was not the very early on poopy diaper contest, which I won by default when my newborn son turned up on the changing table with poop on the top of his head, and the soles of he feet, and most spots in between. It was also not the time an out-of-town friend so admired some cardinal feathers she found that she displayed them for the rest of her visit on the edge of my upstairs bathroom sink. Unfortunately for us, those feather were still attached to a wing, and the wing had been recently ripped from the shoulder socket of poor Mr. Cardinal, which I knew because flesh still hung from the bones. The bones which rested so artfully next to our toothpaste and soap.


It was also not the great fly debacle, which was not so much a disgusting moment as a disgusting and very long month-and-a-half. Our cat, Alpha, had found an already-dead (read: maggot-infested) frog, which he brought into the house before I could stop him. He ran  into the cellar with it, and I ran after him, but I never found the frog. Days later, flies started showing up in the house; first in ones and twos; eventually we had scores, and probably hundreds of flies, mostly in the dining room and kitchen. So at least our tv watching wasn't too impacted. Only our food prep and consumption. I would herd flies into the area between window and screen and then quickly close the window, cross my fingers and then just wait patiently for all the flies to die. I hoped they wouldn't reproduce in there, envisioning my brand new windows closed and permanently nailed shut as generation after generation grew and thrived: our own miniature entomological Great Barrier Reef, Medford-style, in the making.

And over the years I have simply gotten used to picking up every sort of dead animal, or remaining parts thereof, with the longest-handled shovel I own, and flinging it across the fence into the Fells, or into the creek behind the house for burial, eventually, at sea. So dead rodents aren't involved in my most disgusting moment, either.

Agent 98 is.

He was 8 or 9, and came to me with a hangnail. I kept an eye on it, because there's really nothing but time that can heal a hangnail. A day or so later, a soothing soak in epsom salts. A day or so after that he showed me the finger again, but by now it was swollen and red, and really quite infected.

Look away now if you're still eating.

I did the only thing I could think of: I squeezed it to get rid of the infection.  I heard an audible "pop", and 98 felt instant relief. I found a tiny speck on the kitchen floor, and cleaned it up with a wet paper towel. I recall being a bit surprised that his giant swollen finger didn't leave more ... ahem, sorry ... evidence. But I cleaned up, and went on with my life. Ah, not so disgusting, you say?

Weeks later, Tom was in the kitchen, glanced up at the ceiling, and spied what he immediately recognized ... again, ahem, sorry ... as the missing piece of the puzzle.

Yup, I took a picture.